The Man With the Golden Torc (Roc Fantasy) by Simon R. Green

Author:Simon R. Green
Language: eng
Format: mobi
Tags: Fantasy fiction, General, Fantasy:Detective, Fantasy, Visionary & Metaphysical, Supernatural, Fiction, Good and evil
ISBN: 9780451462145
Publisher: ROC
Published: 2008-06-03T21:34:37.261000+00:00

"No, really, I can’t wait to meet Mr. Mole in his hole."

She looked at me. "Your arm’s worse, isn’t it?"

"Yes. Let’s go."

Molly summoned up another spatial portal, frowning with concentration. The process seemed to take longer this time, and sweat ran freely down her face. The air churned and whirled before us, spinning around and around like water going down a plughole. It plucked us off the hilltop and into itself, and we were off on our travels again.

When Molly and I reappeared, we were standing in a toilet cubicle. It was very cramped. Molly and I were pressed tightly together, face to face. Anywhen else, I might have taken a moment to enjoy it, but unfortunately I had one leg jammed down the toilet bowl.

"Oh, shit," said Molly.

"Don’t even go there," I said, struggling to remove my foot from the bowl. "Do I take it we’re not where we were supposed to be?"

"Of course not! But it could have been worse."

"Oh, shit," I said.

"What?"

"It would appear the previous occupant didn’t flush. Would you please breathe in so I can get my foot out?"

We struggled together for a moment, banging loudly against the sides of the cubicle, and finally I was able to jerk my foot free. The bottom of my trouser leg was soaked, and I didn’t want to think what with. I glared at Molly.

"Today started out with a knife at my throat and yet still has managed to go steadily downhill. Where the hell are we?"

"Paddington railway station."

"Really?" I said. "I remember it as being somewhat bigger."

"Fool. We’re in the ladies’ toilet at Paddington. Which means…someone tried to intercept my portal spell."

Getting out of the cubicle took some cooperation and a certain amount of brute force, as the door opened inwards, but eventually we spilled out into the main toilet area. Half a dozen women stopped adjusting their dress and repairing their makeup to stare at us. Molly glared right back at them.

"Come on; don’t tell me you’ve never thought about doing it in a cubicle."

"I feel like such a slut," I said. "Promise me you’ll spank me when we get home, mistress?"

The half dozen women couldn’t get out of the toilet fast enough. I grinned at Molly, but she wasn’t in the mood.

"All right," I said. "On a scale of one to ten, how bad is this?"

"Oh, I think this one goes all the way up to eleven. Someone must have tried to override my spell’s coordinates to make us arrive at a destination of their choosing. Where they could be waiting for us. But, being the happy paranoid little soul that I am, I long ago preprogrammed my spell to be prepared for such an eventuality and, at the first sign of outside tampering, drop me off at a predesignated emergency arrival point."

"God, I love it when you talk technical."

"Shut up. I chose this place because a toilet cubicle is one of the few places where you can just appear out of nowhere without being noticed.

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